Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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