My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
