i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Randomize
