I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize