Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize