We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize
