Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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