did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Randomize