i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
