Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Randomize
