Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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