do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
