i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
