There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
