I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Randomize
