Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
