Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize