is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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