We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Randomize
