Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
