Buhtt sex?
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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