Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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