STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
