At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
We are all done wearing pants today
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
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