hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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