these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
