Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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