You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize