Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Randomize
