I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize
