How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
