I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
