Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
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