I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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