So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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