if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Randomize
