Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
