then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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