i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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