About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
