I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize