chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
