Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
how drunk are you?
Several
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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