found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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