i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
