He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Randomize