I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
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