i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Randomize
