Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
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