I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
