I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
Randomize
