I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
